I'll Be Missing You
by Maria021
Summary: Post "Mayday" Natalia is captured and she thinks about the people she loves the most and sais goodbye
1. I'll Be Missing You

**A/N:** Here comes another one shot, actually it's one shot for now I haven't decided yet, this entire story is told from Natalia's POV she kind off said goodbye to everyone she loves, it's a bit sad, my idea of what happened after "Mayday"… enjoy;)

**Disclaimer:** As always I don't own any of the CSI franchise or any of the characters, I wish owned them because if did Ryan and Natalia would've been a couple

**Summary:** Post "Mayday" Natalia is captured and she thinks about the people she loves the most and sais goodbye

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><p><strong>I'll Be Missing You<strong>

_Answer me…please…_

_I try to call him again but I get the same answer_

_Ryan please…answer me…_

_I can feel the water slowly starting to come through…no matter how hard I try to open it…I'm just not strong enough…I'm going to die here…I'm going to die and nobody will ever find me_

_Bad things always happening because of me…Horatio is hurt because of me and now I'm going to die here _

_Where is everybody don't they know that I'm trapped in here? Why isn't anybody coming to save me? I'm drowning…the water is coming through and I'm losing air…I can feel it…oh my g'd I'm going to die_

_What's going to happen to my mom when she'll find out that I died like…this is going to kill her _

_Mom I love you so much I'm so sorry that I never said that enough…it's been so long since last time I came to visit you and dad and I'm so sorry for this _

_Dad I know you don't agree with some choices I made in my life, you never loved Nick and you were right about him and even after everything that happened I still can't admit that, my pride not allowing me to…you never liked my job but deep inside I know that you accepted the fact that it's what I meant to do_

_It's harder and harder to breathe…is this how it feels when you're dying?_

_My two beautiful sisters I love you both so much you don't need me anymore, you never did actually you always did what was on your mind…it's not that I that much different_

_After all this time and after everything that happened this is going to end like this? Why? Six years I work in the lab, six years doing this working with the guys Horatio, Eric, Calleigh, Maxine, Walter and there was also Jesse and…Ryan I'm never going to see him again…this is the harder thing to accept _

_After all this time, coming to the lab, dating Eric, loosing Ryan because of this, betraying the lab, becoming a CSI, meeting Nick again, being accused of his murder, my sister being kidnapped, loosing Jesse, being kidnapped and now this…it's just going to end_

_This is how it feels like when you are loosing air and you can't breathe anymore…I'm loosing my life but I don't want to…_

_I always had two families my parents and sisters and the lab_

_Horatio…you were like a father to all of us…you never stopped believing in us not matter what we did, even after I betrayed your lab you still allowed me to become a SCI and helped me when I was falsely accused of murdering my ex-husband…thank you for everything and please don't blame yourself for this_

_Calleigh…when I first started working with you I thought that we are so different but I don't think like that anymore, we have a lot in common we're both women that trying too hard to make ourselves look invulnerable so nobody will thing that we are weak just because we are women and sometimes we make ourselves believe that we are invincible and…we are not, I mean look at me right now…I'm dying, Cal you are a great person, a good friend and a very good CSI_

_Eric…we always were better as friends then as a couple, dating you was a mistake not because you are a bad guy to date but because I never loved you and you never loved me and dating somebody you know you don't love is always bad but why are we doing that? Well because dating somebody you don't love is easier, that person can't hurt you that much, unlike somebody you do love… and thinking that way cost me because I've lost Ryan…anyway you were a good friend and a great guy I hope you'll have a nice life_

_Walter…you are a very good guy and a great CSI to work with, I'm sorry that you have to loose another friend just one year ago we lost Jesse_

_It feels like this car is moving up? Am I imagining?_

_This is it, no more air…I'm about to die_

_And Ryan…you will be the hardest one to leave, why? Because I love you…always have, and I owe you an apology…for allowing you to walk away six years ago, you thought that I wasn't interested in you but the truth is that I was, but I allowed my fears to take over me and I lost you…I'm so sorry, you're such a great guy, you deserve the best, over the years I tried to convince myself that the feeling that I have for you it's just strong friendship but it's not, I love you and I wish I have I had the chance to tell you that… I hope you'll find love the way you deserve…just please don't forget me_

_I even hearing your voice right now, that's how much I love you…you sound so real, are you rescuing me? I think it's too late…_

_It's getting darker and darker and the last thing I hear before I get disconnected from reality is your voice…_

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><p><strong>I'm done and I can't decide if it's good, bad or weird<strong>

**I guess it's for you guys to decide**

**R&R**

**(I miss my episodes…no CSI Miami…:( )**

**Maria:)**


	2. I've Been Looking For You

**Thanks for the reviews, usually I respond to reviews individually but I suffer from lack of time and just cant**

**I officially decided to make it a multi chapter fic**

**This chapter is written from Ryan's POV**

**I decided that I'll write a chapter from everyone's POV including Horatio**

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><p><strong>I've been looking for you<strong>

_Come on breath…please just breath…don't do this to me, I'm begging you…breath!_

_You can't do this to me Nat; you have to breathe…just breath_

_She's got a pulse, she's alive so she has to breathe, she can't just not breath! She can't do this to me_

_Her heart beats…still there, I made it on time, I was so scared that I wouldn't find her on time _

_At least Horatio's alright that officer that I brought with me took him to the hospital, he told me to be careful, he said that he doesn't want to loose two CSI…but I couldn't just sit there and wait for backup_

_Because there's nothing in this world that I wouldn't do for her, and I don't care what happens to me as long as she's alright, so I jumped…_

_But she's still not breathing, and she has to breathe _

_I don't remember ever being good at CPR but you don't know if you're good at it unless you need to do it and I need to do it now…to save her_

"One…two…three" I count out loud "come Natalia you can't do this" I say to her "if anyone can do this it's you Talia"

"Come on, one…two…three"

I still feel her pulse but she's not opening her eyes "Natalia" no respond

_Damn it! I lost my phone, I told that officer to call a backup _

_And I don't have a car with me…I need someone to help me with her now! _

_"Natalia" I grab her face with my hands…her beautiful face, her eye closed she's not responding_

_I can't…I can't loose her_

"I know I don't have you Nat and probably never will but I need you in my life"

_I won't live without her, she's everything her presence in my life, her face every morning at work…this is everything_

_I love her, I lover so much_

Another try "one…two…three" nothing

_I feel like I stopped breathing with her, it's like my life passing through my eyes_

_There was actually time before she came into the lab? I was actually working here before I met her? That's impossible _

_I don't remember life before I met Natalia and she's dying in my hands…she can't die _

"You are so strong Natalia, you can do this, you've been through a lot this is nothing, you can do this!"

_There was no response I lowered my head second away from crying_

"How can everything end like this? How…"

Suddenly I heard her coughing

I'm lifted my head "Nat? Natalia" I can feel the hope returning to me

I tried again "one…two…three Natalia come on, you're coming back to me I can feel it"

She started to spit water

"That's it" I say smiling "you're doing this Nat; I knew you can do this"

She spit more water

"Come on Natalia keep doing that, good job" I encourage her

She stopped and looked at me

"Ryan?" she mumbled

"Yes that's me, I'm so glad you alright Nat" I whisper to her

"B-b-but the car" she mumbled "and the water…I was there…and now I'm here, how?"

"I got you out" I said

"How?"

"I don't know" I said honestly "I wasn't thinking about it, I just did"

She stared at me confused

"Are you alright?" I asked softly

"I think so…wait Horatio! He…he…" she tried to get up

"He's going to be alright" I calmed her down "officer took him to the hospital"

"Oh" she sighed with relief and coughed

"He's going to come back for us you just need to hold on a little bit longer"

"I think I'm alright it's just…" she looked nervously around her "where is he?" she asked I could hear fear in her voice

"Who?"

"The person who did this Ryan! Where is he?"

"he has no reason for staying here he probably run away" I said hoping that this would calm her down but she still looked nervous "hey…I'm with you Nat, I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you anymore"

Her eyes were filled with tears "I thought I'm never going to see you again…I tried to call you"

"I'm sorry" I whispered "I lost my phone" I wrapped my arms around her tightly "I was too busy worrying about you; I've been looking for you"

For a moment we both went silent then she started to shake then I heard her whisper in terror

"Ryan…behind you"

I turned my head around and then I saw him…I was wrong he didn't run away

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><p><strong>R&amp;R ;) <strong>


	3. I'll Get There on Time

**Again thanks for the reviews I absolutely love them and thanks for the patience for my slow updates**

**This chapter set from Eric's POV**

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><p><strong>I'll Get There on Time<strong>

I'm driving as fast as I can and it still doesn't look life fast enough, but I know I can't drive any faster and that makes me feel helpless

If I can't drive fast enough to save my friends then I shouldn't drive at all

"You're driving fast Eric" she said

"Seriously?"

She ignored my sarcasm "if we are going to get killed we can't help them"

"If I'll drive like an old grandma it won't help them either" I said

"I'm not asking you to…"

"Damn it Calleigh" I snapped "if you don't care and you want to drive slow then get off"

"Eric please…" she wasn't herself and I wasn't fair but I wasn't in the mood to say the right things, I guess I'll apologize later, meanwhile I have to keep driving, have to get there on time

"You think they alright?" she asked

"I really don't know" I snapped again but then I said more calmly "but I hope so"

After a moment I asked her "why would he do that? Just go off like that"

"He followed his instincts…they worked better then mine" she sighed, she was feeling guilty I could see it in her eyes, maybe I'm selfish because I cant say anything comforting, maybe later…right now I cant think of anything useful to say so I'm just driving…still not fast enough

"He still should've said something" I said "something…"

"It's not important now, but he tried"

"Not hard enough…"

"Damn it Eric!" she snapped

"What? What do you want from me?" I snapped back

"Just…" she started

"You know what" I stopped her "I'm driving here so leave me alone or you the one that's going to get us killed"

She turned her head away from me and looked outside she didn't look angry or upset with the way I talked to her, she was just sad, even I knew it was typical me behavior, every time I'm worried, upset, angry…I attack, tried to change that but I can't, I always attack and apologize when the mess is over

No wonder we can't survive together, it's my fault

But that's not important now…g'd why I always do that?

"Eric…"

"What?"

"Never mind"

She's scared and I know why, it's been a year since Jesse died I wasn't that close to him but he was a part of this team while I was gone and…death is death, especially when it affects the ones that you love so for something like this to happen, it's a bad coincidence, and Tim's death... we've been there and I don't want to loose another friend because I think this time it will break us completely, no more deaths, and I'm scared for both of them, I can admit it only to myself

Don't want to loose either one of them

"Horatio is alright you know" I don't even know why I said it, it's not like it's going to make anybody feel better

"I know that" she said quietly "I'm the one who talked to him"

"One is safe" why am I keep saying stuff like that? It's not helping and it's stupid

"Yes, but everyone else not"

Yes and it's up to us right? So why I'm not getting closer, I keep driving and driving and it feels to me like I'm still at the starting point

I don't even know where we are, I hate this

"Eric stop!" she yelled

"What?"

"We are here, stop!"

"How do you know that?" I asked

"Because I can see Ryan's phone over there on the ground" she pointed and she was right his phone was thrown there but he wasn't there and neither was Natalia, that didn't made me feel very good, if he managed to get her out he would be here with her

Apparently she thought the same because she expressed my concerns out loud "you think he managed to get her out?"

"I hope so" I mumbled I really didn't know what to say

We started walking towards unknown direction, it's frustrating when someone in danger and you not sure what to do or where to go

"Wait" she stopped

"What?"

"You hear that?"

I stopped and listened "yeah it sounds like a mix between two or three voices"

Two of them I recognized

Without saying another word I started to run, she followed me until we both were stopped by the sound of a gunshot

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><p><strong>I think next chapter will be the same scene just from Calleigh's POV, not sure yet<strong>

**R&R :)**


	4. I'm Scared

**Here comes another one, like I promised this one is from Calleigh's POV**

**Again thanks for the reviews and the waiting, I'm trying to be faster with updating but I'm just becoming slower**

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><p><strong>I'm scared<strong>

"You know what" I stopped me "I'm driving here so leave me alone or you the one that's going to get us killed"

I turned my head away from him, I wasn't angry at him, not really…maybe a bit disappointed but just a little, maybe it's because I'm so overwhelmed with concern that I don't have space for any other emotions or maybe because I know him and this his typical behavior, every time he's nervous or upset or worried he snaps and then when everything is alright, one think he tired to change about himself but he cant, and I cant get over that or maybe I never tried…who cares it's not about us it's about Ryan and Nat, they are in danger and I think it's my fault

"Eric" I tried, I don't even know what I tried to tell him maybe I wanted him to confirm my guilt

"What?" he snapped at me

"Never mind" I gave up and continued to look outside

I'm scared, I'm really, really scared

Last year Jesse died he was a friend and part of the team, after all those years at this job the everyday death don't get to you but when it's someone you care about…one of your own, Jesse died suddenly we didn't had enough time to get to know him, and Tim…after so many years it looks like it happened yesterday, it cant happen again because if it will…it will be the end of us, the end of me, I'm not tired of death I'm tired of watching my friends die

"Horatio is alright you know" he said, I looked at him, he's just looking for something to say

"I know that" I said "I'm the one who talked to him" I reminded him

"One is safe"

"Yes but everyone else not"

And who's fault this is? Probably mine, because I didn't listen to Ryan, why? Damn it why? This is defiantly my fault

Where are we? I don't see any sign or Ryan and Na…wait a minute what's this?

"Eric stop!" I yelled

"What?"

"He are here, stop!"

"How do you know that?" he looked at me surprised

"Because I can see Ryan's phone over there on the ground" I pointed directly and he noticed it

But Ryan himself wasn't there and neither Natalia, that's not good, not good at all

"You think he managed to get her out?" I asked

"I hope so" he answered we wasn't really sure what to say neither was I

We started to walk slowly towards unknown direction; it was very frustrating and hopeless situation

Suddenly I stopped "wait" I said to him

"What?"

"You hear that?"

He stopped and listened with me "yeah it sound like a mix between two or three voices" he heard the same thing I heard and probably like me he recognized those voices

Without saying another word he started to run, I followed him until we both were stopped by the sound of a gunshot

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

I held my friend's hand, it was covered in blood

"You going to be alright" I said "you have to"

"Too much blood" said the paramedic

Too much blood it's not good, not good at all, it's not supposed to be like this

I finally realized why Eric was so obsessed with the speed, the driver of the ambulance is driving as fast as he can but it don't look fast enough not when my friend is bleeding

Why couldn't both of them be ok? Why one had to get hurt? And why I'm not as shocked as I'm supposed to be that it happened?

"The patient is in consciousness" said another paramedic

"Consciousness?" I repeated the words

My friend can hear me? I need to say that I'm sorry

"Not completely but yes"

"If I'll say something will…"

"I don't know" said the paramedic without letting me finish "maybe yes and maybe not but if there's something you want to say I recommend that you try"

Because my friend can die, is that what he's trying to tell me? But he's right if I have something to say I need to say it now or… can't think like that

"I'm sorry" I whispered "I'm really, really sorry what happened to you was my fault"

I'm not the kind if person that cries, I'm strong that's how I'm known but right now I don't care, the tear that dropped and got mixed with the blood didn't bother me

"If you'll live you probably going to hate me so please hate me, please live" I begged "please..."

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><p><strong>It was hard to find the right words without letting you know who got shot but I think it worked<strong>

**And yes I know….I'm evil :)**

**R&R ;)**


	5. All Of Our Children

**I'm back!**

**I know it took me a while and I'm sorry but I know that I have to finish this story fat because the new season is getting closer and closer (yes!)**

**This chapter is from Horatio's and Alexx's POV**

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><p><strong>All of our children<strong>

I used to believe that I can always save them all at any time at any moment, apparently I can't, I should've learned something from Tim's and Jesse's death , another person in my place would understand that he's failing but I couldn't stop playing the hero, the saver, apparently I can only save strangers when it come to my own I'm not doing such a great job lately

I can't be here anymore I have to get outside and do something, really can't stay here anymore I need to leave without anybody seeing me

I tried to get out of bed, my gunshot wound wasn't serious but it still hurt really bad…I had worse I can work with that, I have to

I took deep breath and set down on the edge of my hospital bed

"I can see what you trying to do Horatio" I heard a voice "you're not going anywhere"

"I need to leave Alexx" I said "I'm not helping anybody by being here"

"You got shot" she said taking a step towards me "you can't leave yet in your condition"

"It's not that bad" I protested "I've had worse in my life you know that"

"I know…but I wasn't your doctor them and now I am"

"It really isn't that bad Alexx…" I tried to argue even though deep inside I knew there's no point…Alexx was one of few people that I couldn't argue with

"You are a lot of things Horatio being a doctor isn't one of them" she said with a serious expression

"I need to leave this place Alexx" I said quietly "I need to go and help them"

"I know" she said with understanding "but you no good to them dead or hurt, I'm sorry Horatio but I'm you doctor and you're not leaving this hospital"

"I'm worried Alexx"

"I know" she sighed "I'm also worried those are my children too Horatio"

I looked at her, we were feeling the same pain, she was right this is her team too

"Have you heard something from them…about them"

"No…Calleigh called she checked on you, she said that they on their way to find them but…that was all she said"

"Can you do me a favor Alexx? Call her please…"

Alexx sighed and shook her head

"You already tried?" I guessed

"About every ten minutes Horatio" she sounded a bit insulted "I told you those are my children too"

"I'm sorry Alexx" I apologized "I can't stop thinking about what might happen"

"I know" said Alexx "me too…I'll call her again, if that's going to stop you from leaving"

"Thank you Alexx"

She didn't answer me, she just left my room, I don't know if she was insulted or just worried, I really wanted this day to end…to come to work tomorrow with all my team alive, to solve another crime, like nothing happened

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Bad day…very bad day

Since the day I started to work here I was terrified of a day like this, every time I heard that police officer comes in I always think "please g'd don't let it be one of them"

And today was this day, one of my worst nightmares came true and it still hasn't ended I still don't know where my kids are and if they're ok, Ryan and Natalia…my boy and my baby girl somebody might hurt them and can't do anything about that unless they get here… I really wish they won't

I'm afraid to make that call, I'm afraid that Calleigh won't answer me but I more afraid that she will and tell me something I really don't want to hear

I picked my cellphone and with extremely bad feeling…deep inside I knew that I'm not going to hear good news

"Alexx…" I heard Callegih's cutoff voice

"Yes…Calleigh I'm calling to ask if there's any news…Cal?"

"Ahm…" she wasn't in a hurry to answer me

"Calleigh" I raised my voice

"We're on our way"

"On your way where? Where are you right now"

"Inside an ambulance" she said

That's exactly what I was afraid to hear I felt my heart stopping "Calleigh what happened? Please tell me…please"

I heard a strange sound coming from the other side of the line…was she crying?

"Calleigh…is…is someone dead?" I asked the most terrifying question…she's inside an ambulance, ambulance means that somebody alive but…

"No…"

"But?"

"We are on our way" she repeated

I closed the phone and looked at the door leading to Horatio's room, I'm not going to tell him yet because I myself don't know what's going on yet and if I'll tell him anything he will leave the hospital

When people come to this hospital they are in our hands – the doctors's, their loved ones can't help them anymore, as soon as they get here they are in my hands and I'm the only one who can save them

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

I waited at the entrance of the hospital like I do every day waiting for new patients to arrive, usually I don't except it to be somebody I know

The moments the came after I saw the ambulance where a blur

I remember two people coming out from one ambulance it was Eric and somebody else that was covered in a blanket, I remember another ambulance and Calleigh coming out of it then came the paramedics…then I saw him he was covered in blood…my boy

"Ryan baby…what happened to you?"

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><p><strong>That's it, I'm guessing next chapter will be the last one<strong>

**R&R**


	6. Just Sit Here With Me

**OMG The season premiere, it wasn't the best CSI:Miami episode I've watched but it had a lot of Natalia time, not enough of Ryan but it was ok because the Ryan\Natalia scene was a real RaiN fan paradise for me it was made friendly but still really fun for me to watch**

**And 10.2 had some funny Ryan moments = just the way I like it**

**So I thought that should wrap up this story, this chapter not from anyone's POV just a regular chapter**

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><p><strong>Just Sit Here With Me<strong>

'This is taking too long' thought Natalia walking back and forth in the waiting room

"Nat…can you stop walking…you making me nervous" said Calleigh

"Well I'm nervous!" snapped Natalia "and if you don't think I have a reason to be nervous you welcome to walk out of here and leave me alone!"

Calleigh sighed

Natalia leaned against the wall "I'm sorry Calleigh I just…"

"I know Nat…it's been a long day, especially for you I don't know how you steel standing"

"If Ryan wasn't here I wouldn't be standing I can't do anything without knowing if he's ok or not"

"I know…Natalia?"

"Yeah"

"What happened between you two there?"

Natalia looked surprised "what do you mean? Isn't that obvious? He tried to shoot me and Ryan make sure that the bullet hits him" she took a deep breath trying to keep her from crying

"All the way to the hospital before he passed out he mumbled things to me"

"Things like what?"

"Well I couldn't understand most of it but what I heard most clearly was 'tell her that I meant what I said' to have any idea what was that about?"

Natalia didn't answer she just turned with her back to a Calleigh leaning her with her face against the wall

"Natalia are you alright?"

"No…" mumbled Natalia she tried to hide it but it was obvious that she was crying "nothing is alright…this is not fair"

"Nothing about this is fair Nat…this is not sup post to happen to you Horatio or Ryan" she tried to put a comforting had on Natalia's shoulder but Natalia backed away

"It's not supposed to happen to Ryan it supposed to happen to me!"

"Natalia don't talk like that…"

"Why not?" she yelled "I was the one testifying on the damn trial! I was the one that he put in the trunk! And I was the one that he was trying to shoot! And he should've shot me! Me! Not Ryan or anybody else, me!"

"Natalia" with every step that Calleigh made towards Natalia she took a step back

"I can't do this…" mumbled Natalia

"Nat..He's going to be ok, I'm sure of it"

"I doesn't matter don't you get it? He's not supposed to be on this situation"

"Natalia, this is not happening because of you, this is happening because of a very unstable man"

Natalia shook her head "no this is me, I'm cursed, and people who love me get punished for it"

Calleigh looked confused "love you what do you mean?"

"Never mind I just…I need to be alone right now" she said and stormed out of the waiting room bumping onto Eric on her way out

"Wow Natalia where are you going? Where is she going?" he asked Calleigh after Natalia disappeared from the view

"She needs to be alone" said Calleigh and sighed

"That make sense I guess" mumbled Eric "coffee?" he asked

"Thanks" she smiled sadly and took the mug from his hands

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

"Horatio you can't stand here all day" said Alexx "you got shot standing here forever is not going to help him wake up"

They stood outside of Ryan's room by the time Alexx and the other doctors did everything they could and all is left to do is to wait

"I need to know that he's alright first" said Horatio

"You don't know how long this will take" said Alexx softly "when I will have news you'll be the first one to know Horatio I promise…"

He looked at her "I guess I surrender…but Alexx if there's anything…"

"Like I said the first one to know"

She sighed sadly as he walked away, she forced Horatio to leave but she wasn't planning to leave herself

'When Ryan wakes up he needs to see a familiar face' she thought

"Alexx?"

Alexx turned around and saw Natalia standing a few steps away from her, she looked like of she was afraid to come any closer

"What is it Natalia? Why aren't you coming in?"

"I can?" she asked

"Well…" Alexx smiled "according to hospital policy you can't but…who cares"

"I just I'm not sure this is such a good idea for me to be there…" she mumbled

"Why sweetie?" asked Alexx "I hope you don't blame yourself for what happened right?"

"You talked to Calleigh?"

"Oh baby I don't need Calleigh to tell me how to read you" she said and gave Natalia a motherly smile "I know you remember? And I think you being ridiculous but…" she said when Natalia opened her mouth to answer "I know you well enough to see that there isn't any point to argue with you, I'll leave it up to him"

"So now what?" asked Natalia

"Now we think about what's best for him, when he wakes up he needs to see a familiar face and I believe that the face we wants to see the most is yours"

"You really think that?"

"I do" said Alexx and smiled "do it Natalia, go sit next to him talk to him, and make him feel that he's not alone"

Natalia sighed "Alright" slowly she made one step towards Ryan's room, she stopped with every step as if she was making any damage by being so close when she finally approached his bed she said "Ryan…why did you do this?"

She took his hand in her hands and whispered "I'm not worth it"

"You always help even when I'm not very nice to you and I don't deserve you…I don't deserve to be loved by a guy like you…and why the hell you needed to get shot in order to tell me that you loved me?" she snapped

"Sorry" she sighed "I can't blame you for anything this is my entire fault"

She closed her eyes "I can't loose you Ry, the only reason that I survived everything that happened to me lately is because I know that I have you around and your presence always makes me feel better…oh g'd"

"Nat…is that you?"

She opened her eyes "Ryan? You awake?"

Ryan slowly opened his eyes "where am I?"

"Hospital…you took a bullet remember? How are you feeling?"

"I have a headache"

Natalia smiled "obviously…you scared me"

"No…you scared me Natalia, are you alright?"

She smiled again "you are the one that's in a hospital bed"

"I meant emotionally"

"I'm better now" she said and squeezed his hand a bit "like I said you scared me…you know what I should call a doctor to come and check on you" she tried to get up but he pulled her back

"You can do that in a minute" he said "just sit with me for a while, you presence makes me feel better"

He smiled at her and she smiled back

"Alright" she said "I'll stay"

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><p><strong>THE END<strong>

**R&R**


	7. I Can Handle Anything with You

**Ok I know that I said that the previous chapter was the last but someone made me change my mind **

**This chapter is kind of post 10.1 but in a my own version I changed the entire events including the dialogs**

**So this is for you Katia **

**And for all of you…enjoy :)**

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><p><strong>I Can Handle Anything with You<strong>

"Calleigh" called Eric walking into the ballistic lab

"What is it?"

"Have you seen Natalia?"

"No I didn't, why?"

"She was supposed to interrogate Randy North but then she disappeared" said Eric "and I can't find her"

"You can't exactly blame her" said Calleigh "I'll do it instead of her"

"It's not just that, I don't know where she is I can't find her…what?" he asked noticing Calleigh's face expression "you know something that I don't?"

"I don't know…but I can guess"

Eric looked confused "what are you talking about?"

Calleigh sighed 'even the smartest men are sometimes so clueless' she thought

"I think I have an idea where she went" she said

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

"This is really bad idea of food" said Ryan out loud picking up a spoon fool of something that he couldn't describe "I can't eat that even if I starve to death"

"Talking to ourselves are we?" he heard a familiar voice and lifted his eyes to see a beautiful brunette smiling at him

"No I'm just expressing my frustration out loud"

"You frustration with you lunch?" asked Natalia taking a seat on the chair next to his bed

"This is not food, if that's food then I'm….an alien"

"Well about that…I depends who you ask" said Natalia

"Ha h…ouch!" said Ryan holding to his wound "maybe laughing isn't such a good idea"

"Are you sure you alright maybe I should call a doctor?"

"Just because it hurts doesn't mean I'm dying it supposed to hurt…anyway I think it's you I should be worried about"

"Why?" asked Natalia

"Because you're here in the middle of the day when you should be working" said Ryan

"It's not like this is the first time I came to visit you during lunch break in the last week" said Natalia avoiding looking into his eyes because when she did she felt like he could read her thoughts

"It's not lunch break time" said Ryan "come on Nat… talk to me"

Natalia sighed "why can't you be stupid sometimes? It could make a lot if things a lot easier"

"I tried but I'm just too damn smart…so what's up?"

"We found Randy" said Natalia "through his son…not the way I wanted but we had no choice"

"I see and where is he now?"

"Waiting for interrogation…"

"Let me guess you feel like you can't do that"

Natalia smiled bitterly "I don't feel like I can do any of this anymore…I think that I'm done"

"Natalia…" he said "you're not talking about being a CSI"

"Why not ha?" she snapped "Ryan take a look on the year that I had, drugged kidnapped two times and now this! When I was at the trunk I really thought that it was the end…of everything and I don't think that I can do this anymore I'm not ready to die like this"

Ryan noticed a single tear rolling down her face he rested his hand an hers and said "Nat…look at me, a few years ago I had a really bad incident…I got shot with a nail gun and as I remember it affected me really bad, I was afraid to go out on the field I used lame excuses in order to stay in the lab and even then I was afraid to look down at microscope"

"Yeah I remember that" said Natalia

"Well let's see if you remember that…my friend I don't know if you met her she's beautiful crazy but also extremely smart" Natalia smiled "well she told me that I'm better than anything that this job does to me and that I better get back to the field or she'll drag me there by my hair"

"G'd I have some convincing skills" said Natalia and they both laughed

"Yeah" he said "You are, and now it's my turn to tell you…you are better and stronger and smarter than anything that this job does to you"

"Thank you Ryan" she whispered

"You welcome, so are you coming back?"

"In one condition…"

"Which is?"

"Go out with me? I mean for a date"

"Nat…" sighed Ryan "I don't think it's such a good idea"

"Why not?" asked Natalia "you changed your mind about what you said to me"

"No I didn't…"

"Then what's your problem" asked Natalia

"There's a reason why I've been alone my entire life Nat" said Ryan

"And what's that…"

"Well the fact that I'm mentally disturbed…and dating me requires a lot of patience"

Natalia smiled "you can't be serious Ryan…it's true you got your weirdness but we all do"

"Yes but mine gonna make you run away from me after a week and then I'll lose two things…a girlfriend and my best friend and I don't want to do that"

"You never gonna lose me I promise, come on Ryan let's not let anything that happened lately be for nothing…"

"You have a point there…alright let's do that"

"Alright then it's a date" smiled Natalia she got up placed a soft kiss on his cheek "I got to go back to work now"

"Wait when are we going to do this and where?"

"I'll thing of something" said Natalia "I'll wait for you when you'll get released"

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

"When you said you'll wait for me you weren't kidding" said Ryan after he left the hospital and found Natalia waiting for him outside next to her car

"I figured it'll be better of you wouldn't drive" she said and before he had a chance to answer she wrapped her arms around him

"So I figured you happy to see me out of the hospital" he said hugging her back

"I'm happy you're alright" she whispered to his ear and before he could understand what's going on he felt her lips on his automatically his arms were wrapped around her waist and he started kissing back

"Not that I'm complaining" he said when they parted "but what was that all about"

"Hallow" said Natalia smiling

"Is that how you going to tell me hallow every time you'll see me" smiled Ryan

"Maybe…"

"Aren't we moving too fast, I mean I thought that first date comes before first kiss"

"After all those years I don't think we have to follow to rules"

"Good point" said Ryan getting into the car "so where are we going?"

"My place" she said getting into the driver's seat "I made dinner and I have a movie ready for us to watch"

"G'd bless you I had enough of hospital food and their TV never works"

She smiled…as they drove off she looked at him and smiled

'if this is how we end up' she thought 'then it was worth it because whatever happens now we can always beat it together, I can handle anything with him by my side'

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><p><strong>OK IT'S THE REALL END<strong>

**R&R**


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